Father and Sun

I came in. I knew it was going to be war.

Me:  Good evening sir.
Dad: Why are you just coming home?

He's never happy. I stared. I stared so deeply. At nothing. Only at the picture in my head. The picture of what would become of me when this conversation was over.

Dad: Have you become dumb? Or is it deaf?
Me:  I hurried home as soon as I could.
Dad: Óti daran léni.
Me:  But daddy, I'm not late. Look, it's still bright.
Dad: Where is the sun?
Me:  Uhn?
Dad: If you say that again...where is the sun?
Me:  It's outside.

Dad: Are you sure?
Me:  I saw it on my way in.
Dad: Go out. Look for it. And then come in to call me as soon as you find it. 2 minutes only.

I'm outside now. Looking for the sun. It's not here. But I saw it on my way in. The sun has gone home too early. I told my dad the sun had left. He made me ride a motionless motorcycle with no motorcycle.

Dad: The galaxy is your destination.

I was to find the sun and beg it to follow me home so that daddy could release me. He told me to hurry. Well, I'm still riding. My legs are shaking. I'm drowning in my body liquid. I have still not found the sun. Even when the sun eventually rises, nothing would change. The only sun my father knows is my mother's eyes and it died the day her eyes never opened again. Her eyes never opened again the day I came into this world. That's why he calls me Onwa. "It is the moon that causes the earth to be sunless. You could have been rain or oxygen or helium. But you chose to be the moon", he always says to me. How am I supposed to bring that Sun back? Mother...if I had your golden eyes, father might be at peace...I pray he finds another sun.

Ugly Is Not Skin

Anu:  Dad?
Dad:  Yes
Anu:  What is beauty?

Dad:  Uhn?

Anu:  What is beautiful?

Dad:  Is there a girl?

Anu:  No-o-o. My friends keep making comments about girls being beautiful and ugly. It gets me confused sometimes. 

Dad:  Why?

Anu:  When John and Ana just began their relationship, he was crazy about her beauty. We all were. But now he calls her ugly.

Dad:  And that confuses you?

Anu:  Yea

Dad:  Even at 25?

Anu:  It's all confusing. I was talking to Lillian the other day and...

Dad:  The pretty face?

Anu:  Yes. I was having a deep conversation with her. When she left, Aaron told me never to love an ugly woman. That put me in a mind-fix. I questioned him but he kept sealed. What is this thing called Beautiful?

Dad:  On one of the days when I and your mother had our honeymoon, we went shopping. We came by a China store. We had a dinner to attend the next day and the day after and so she needed two gowns. There were only two gowns in that store that fitted her body size. But she didn't like one of them.

Anu:  Why?

Dad:  She felt it wasn't colourful. She was not going to buy the not-colourful dress but I convinced her. And so she bought both gowns. Seven months after she had won the gowns, the colourful one had nearly faded and torn open on her way from a party. She felt so embarrassed. Yes. She was vexed. She swore never to buy anything from that China store.

Anu:  What about the gown that wasn't colourful?

Dad:  I didn't say it wasn't colourful. I said she felt if wasn't colourful.

Anu:  So you thought it was colourful?

Dad: I think.

Anu:  So what happened to that gown?

Dad:  Who did your mother give since forever to?

Anu:  ( laughs) oh mine! Kemi! You're joking right? 

Dad:  (laughs)

Anu:  She wore it last weekend. I took pictures of her.

Dad:  Yes.

Anu:  Mehn! I always loved to see mum wear it. That's the oldest thing my eyes have witnessed.

Dad:  And almost all of you happen to like it.

Anu:  It's 29 years old? We should host a 30th birthday celebration for it, maybe side by side with your anniversary. 

Dad: The beauty of a woman is not defined by now. It only grows with passing years.

Anu:  The beauty of the heart?

Dad:  Beyond appearance.

Anu:  Character?

Dad:  Virtue

Anu:  Compassion?

Dad:  Faithfulness

Anu:  Perseverance?

Dad:  Purposeful 

Anu:  Humility? 

Dad:  Prudent

Anu:  Home-maker?

Dad:  Home-keeper

Anu:  Strong?

Dad:  Confident

Anu:  Invaluable? 

Dad:  Trustworthy 

Anu:  Diligent?

Dad:  Charitable

Anu:  Wise?

Dad:  We could go on and on. Anu, men too must possess these qualities. A beautiful gown cannot admire and wear itself.

Anu:  You're definitely a beautiful man. Mere eyes cannot discern beauty.

Dad:  It's metaphysical. We'll celebrate.

Anu:  Celebrate what?

Dad:  The day your debut girlfriend arrives.
Anu:  Oh yes! She has to be beautiful tho...
Dad:  I'm up above the sky wondering what you mean...but I think I might know...

Crabby Mama

Nana: Hey mum.
Mum: Yes Nana. Did you enjoy it?
Nana: Yea mum.
Mum: So what fast food joint did you guys go to?

Nana:  We didn't. We took a walk. It was a romantic walk. I loved the environment. So natural. The trees, the spring, the fountain. the birds, the river...

Mum:  Did you guys swim?

Nana:  Nopeee. We only admired. We held hands too. There was so much emotions. I'm in love with him.

Mum:  What have you eaten since you left?

Nana:  Nothing. Doesn't matter.

Mum:  Did you tell him to put the ring on your finger?

Nana:  Mummy! Oh please. The time will come. I guess he's not ready yet.

Mum:  Of course he's not. He's job hunting. That should explain the walk instead of a meal with candles.

Nana:  Mum!

Mum:  Well, flowers do not blossom forever.

Nana:  I know that...as I was saying...the environment was so beautiful. And you know what?

Mum:  What?

Nana:  I saved a crab. It was just by the riverside. I hope it survives.

Mum:  Saved an edible crab?

Nana:  Yea mum-

Mum:  No! Shut up! You don't save a crab when you go on a date and return with no gift items and an empty stomach.😾

Nana:  I should have left it to die?

Mum:  No. You don't leave it. You bring it home. It's food for the stomach. Do you even think?

Nana:  But there's no way I would have brought the crab home. He would have wondered why and that's shameful.

Mum:  Well, let him wander away next time. He cannot even afford a comb.

Nana:  I've told you it's dreadlocks. That's the hairstyle.

Mum:  He can barely feed himself and you're ashamed to survive? Crabs are meant to be brought home and broke-men into the gutters.

Nana:  I'll pretend you didn't say that.😔

Mum:  But I did. Feed your hungry stomach with thoughts of romance and a beautiful environment. Sleep well my child. Let me know when you bring a crab home.😠

What if My Chest Was Not Swollen?

When you look at my chest before you finally say I'm beautiful, I terribly wonder what you mean. If you belong to the school of thought that believes that a woman's beauty is in the heart, I wonder if you see my heart through my swollen chest. Is my chest a mirror, a mirror through which you see yourself? If it is a mirror, what do you see yourself doing when you look at it? When my sister's husband tells her she's beautiful, he looks into her eyes with his palm on her left cheek. But you? My chest.


What if my chest is no more, will I still be beautiful?

Hello

She doesn't understand why Steve wouldn't talk. Carol had told her Tobi was selling his property but that was the best she knew. And now, she has to find Moses. It's a world of too many for her.

She fixes her eyes on her phone, hoping it will ring. It doesn't. And then it finally does. "Hello. Is that you Moses? Moses? Please respond." The phone beeps. Now she's more worried. It was an unknown number. There's no option of calling back. Then it rings again. "Moses. Is that you? Please don't hang up." "Shut up. It's me." "Hi Carol. Was it you who called the previous time?" "No. Why?" "I thought it was Moses." There was silence. Thick silence. Tangible silence. "Carol? Are you going to say something? Carol? Carol?" The phone beeps again. Only this time, she runs out of the house.

She opens the door quietly. "What are you doing here? You should not be here." She stares at Carol with eyes filled with tears. "Where's Moses, Carol? What did you do to Steve?" "Why would you think I did anything to them? I have not seen Moses for weeks now. Didn't I tell you that?" "Why are you baking cake? Why won't Steve say anything to me? What's happening Carol? I'm going to run mad if I don't get answers."

"Hi. My name's Dave and I know where Moses is. Meet me at the Razor Hall in 3 hours." Phone beeps. "Hello. Hello." "You can't trust this guy." "I can't trust you either." "I'm coming with you." "Stay out of my way Carol. You happen to be everywhere I am and it's a curse. Get out of my life."

The Razor Hall is dark. And silent. She can't see anything. "Hello. Is anybody here? Hello. Hello. Is there someone here?" And then she hears something behind her. She turns around but it's too dark to see anything. She feels someone move swiftly beside her. "You took a very big risk coming here. You shouldn't have." Someone grabs her from behind. She screams. The lights come on. "Oh my God. What have you guys done." "Happy birthday." "Moses. Steve. Tobi. Why the drama? I can't believe this." "You deserve more. You mean everything to us. Wanted to give you a surprise birthday. But the drama was all Carol's idea." "Why's Carol not here?" "She's still icing the cake." "Please tell Carol she's not a curse. I didn't mean that."

Me Door

The door opened but no one came in. And then the door closed. I'm definitely home alone, unless Gina wants to give me a surprise. Nah! She's in Colombia. Not even Edo airways can get her here in time. But what opened and closed this door? I know I scared life out of Femi yesterday. He surely wants a pay back but he's still in shock...in the hospital. Did Mary just walk in? Nah! She cares for no one when Dave is in town. What the hell opened this door? I'm trying not to pee in my panties. Is this is a prank? The door just opened again. And again! That's a shadow...I'm done. Is that really a shadow? Whose shadow? Naughtie me.....the shadow is the door's. And the mysterious opener? The stupid wind came to say hi. Hello Windy. Don't try that shit again.